Firing the Toothfairy

Can you spell lame? I can... M-A-T-T-A-N-D-A-I-M-E-E. (Oh, I'm so relieved... Aubree just walked into the room while I am writing this and said, "You guys aren't lame. Just sometimes you do wacky, nervy stuff." I guess that says it all when my 11 year old feels that way.)

I will totally admit it. We are lame parents, in more ways than one.

Let's just say that our family's toothfairy is very forgetful. Many, many times my children have excitedly put a newly lost tooth under their pillow. Many, many times they have woken up in the morning with nothing under their pillow except their tooth. At first they would come upstairs, so bummed, and we would say, "Oh, let's look again." Then magically the two quarters would be there under the pillow. (Yes, our toothfairy is cheap, too.)

After the monotony of this situation wore on, the kids started coming upstairs and saying things like, "The toothfairy forgot again." We would reply, "That darn toothfairy! I think we need to get a new one."

"Yeah, let's fire our toothfairy!" came the ecstatic reply.

Then we told the kids that since we had such a forgetful toothfairy that maybe it would be better if they left their tooth up on the kitchen counter. We got much better results from that plan, albeit a very lame plan.

So I'm writing this to let our, ahem, toothfairy know that she is officially fired. We are tired of having to put the teeth on the kitchen counter. We are tired of the forgetfulness. We are tired of ONLY TWO QUARTERS. Puleeeeease! Are we living in the 20th century, or what?

(I'll let you all know how the next tooth-under-the-pillow goes.)

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